Am I humble or what?

The last day or so I've been thinking about Smith's words on p.28:

"The Holy Spirit is often the member of the Trinity that get the least attention. We pray to God the Father, and when we read about Jesus in the Gospels we can picture him in human form. But the Holy Spirit is not often the focus of our lives. I have come to believe that the Holy Spirit is not upset about this."

Yesterday I had the distinct "priviledge" of sitting in an Urgent Care waiting room for over 2 hours while a student was being treated by a doctor for flu-like symptoms. During my wait I was reading over Smith's words about the humility and work of the Holy Spirit. I was moved as I reflected on this grace. It was amazing for me to think about all that the Holy Spirit does, what it has done in my life in terms of revealing truth, convicting me of sin, pointing me to Jesus, healing my brokenness, and yet how very little attention and or thought I can give to it. And I wondered if it really didn't mind that like Smith said. I started thinking about how I would feel if it were me.

Here's a little ironic twist --- at the very time I've got this conversation happening in my head, in another part of my brain I'm thinking about how long I've been waiting for this student and how much work I have to get done. I'm wondering if he really appreciates what I'm doing for him or not. I'm feeling pretty proud of myself for the "sacrificial" thing I'm doing by carting him around, exposing myself to potential sickness, taking time away from "ministry", etc. etc.

Not ONE time did I make the connection...at least not until later. And really I didn't make that connection until I was prompted once again by you know who. What is wrong with me? At the very time I'm moved by the humility of God, His willingness to love and serve me even when I don't acknowledge Him, and then I turn right around and act/think arrogantly about how I have to help someone else. Sound like a story you've heard before? Yeah, me too.

Holy Spirit, thank you for not treating me the way I treat you. Thank you for always being there to help me, even when I'm stuck in my own self-centered junk. Thanks for not leaving me stuck, but faithfully prompting me once again. Thank you Lord for not giving up on me, please help me to remember what you've done for me, and to give grace to others as easily and freely as You.